


A Day in the Life of a Fast Food Employee

by WhiskersandQuiff



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: Fast Food, Food mention, M/M, McDonald's, Uncle!Dan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-02
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-28 07:43:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12601660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhiskersandQuiff/pseuds/WhiskersandQuiff
Summary: Phil works at McDonald's and just wants to go home when a huge family comes in and orders obnoxiously, but it's okay because Uncle Dan is incredibly attractive.





	A Day in the Life of a Fast Food Employee

**Author's Note:**

> Based partly on my own experiences working in fast food
> 
> I also post to my Tumblr! See the rest of my fics [here](https://whiskersandquiff.tumblr.com/fics-masterlist)

Phil was counting down the hours until he finally got to leave work for the night. He had an eight hour shift from noon until eight and it was only three o' clock but he was already so bored. People would come in to order their food in waves of about 20 people but, in the time between those waves, the dining room went very quiet and very still. 

The door opening jolted Phil back into the Cashier Position, complete with incredibly fake smile and a less-than-hearty "Hi, welcome to McDonald's! I can help you over here if you're ready!" 

“C’mon, everybody, go inside, that's it, we don't want to leave the doors open forever, come on now," said the man in the door as he shepherded at least four children into the restaurant. Phil was taken aback by how attractive he was; he was tall and had brown curly hair and he was wearing black skinny jeans that showed off his legs brilliantly. His dark flannel button-down accentuated his pale skin and the angles of his face. 

"Uncle Dan Uncle Dan I want chicken nuggets!" one small voice called. 

"I want a Happy Meal!" cried another. 

"I want a shake!" 

"Ok, guys, walk over to the counter! Janet, you can't sit on the floor there, come on, we need to order food for you," the man, probably Dan, shuffled his way up to the front with the kids. 

Phil giggled a little at the haggard look on Dan's face. "Hi, what would you guys like?" 

Dan looked up from where he was holding one little girl's hand and a little boy was sitting on his foot with his arms wrapped around his leg. "Um. Right. Okay, I'll take a Number 2, large, and then whatever these guys are getting. Sorry, they're a bit much," he yelled over the excited chatter of the children dancing around him. 

"It's no problem," Phil yelled back. It was most definitely a problem, however. Phil usually didn't mind kids, but he could hardly hear what the man was ordering and their voices were so grating and shrill that he found himself irritated already. 

"Right, Janet, what do you want?" 

"A Big Mac!"

"Try something else, there is no way you can eat that much burger. How about a Happy Meal?" 

"A Big Mac!" 

Dan sighed. "She'll have a hamburger Happy Meal with the fries and a chocolate milk." 

"But I wanted a Big Mac, Uncle Dan!" 

"You're getting a Happy Meal, Janet." 

The little girl holding his hand pouted. 

"Marcus, which Happy Meal do you want?" 

"I GOT KETCHUP!" A small hand shot up from somewhere behind the counter, holding a small cup of ketchup. 

In any other circumstances, Phil would have laughed. As it was, however, he was starting to get quite irritated. The kids were extremely loud and now more people were starting to come in, causing a long line to form as the indecisive group continued to bicker. 

"You can't have a shake, Marcus, your mother told me not to give you anything inherently sugary."

"What does incoherently mean?" Marcus asked. 

"Not incoherently, inherently. And it means that you need to pick a drink or I will pick one for you." 

"Juice box!" 

Dan looked up at Phil again. "He'll have the nuggets Happy Meal with the fries and a juice box."

Phil had to hold himself back from rolling his eyes and telling the man that _yes, the fries come with the Happy Meal and you have to actually ask for the apple slices._ "Alright. Do you want toys for all of these Happy Meals?" 

"TOYS! TOYS! TOYS!" the kids yelled. 

"I'll take that as a yes," said Phil, sighing internally but maintaining his Cheery Cashier facade. 

"Can you make them all the same toy? Then they can't fight over them," Dan pleaded. 

Phil softened at the look in Dan's eyes. He looked truly worn down and desperate. "Yeah, sure. What else would you like?" 

Dan looked around him. "Who hasn't ordered yet? June?" 

The girl quietly hiding behind Dan's leg stepped forward a bit and said something very quietly that was quickly covered up by someone yelling "LOOK AT THE DRINKS MACHINE!" 

Dan's head snapped up. "No! Marcus, do not touch! Get back over here!"

Marcus, looking very guilty, walked back to the group. 

"June, you have to speak louder, honey, I can't hear you," Dan said. 

June mumbled again, causing Dan to bend over to be able to hear her repeat herself again. This gave Phil an excellent view of Dan's butt, which Phil had to say made up for a lot of the horrors that were happening around him now. 

Dan straightened himself again and told Phil, "She'll have a nugget Happy Meal with apple slices and a chocolate milk." 

June tugged on Dan's sleeve, so he leaned over to her again. "She also wants a cup for water." 

"Okay, anything else?" Phil asked. 

"Uncle Daaaan I haven't ordered yet!" said the little girl that had gotten the ketchup earlier. 

"Oh, right. Sorry, Mary, which Happy Meal do you want?"

"I don't wanna get a Happy Meal, I want the McRib sandwich!" 

"Mary, I don't think they have that right now. Besides, that is way too much food for you."

"But Uncle Daaaaaaaaaaan I want iiiiiiiit," Mary cried. Phil tried not to bash his head into the register. 

"Mary, you can't have it. See, let me ask this nice man if they have McRib sandwiches." Dan turned to him, giving him a look that clearly begged Phil to say, _No, we don't have those_ , whether they actually had them or not. 

Luckily for Phil, he didn't have to lie. "Sorry, we don't have those right now."

"When will they be back?" demanded Mary. 

"I don't know, sorry. Probably next year some time?" Phil said. He really had no idea; he wasn't told anything about it until it was back and he had to try to sell it. He hated when people asked him things like that. Why would he know? Sure he works there, but he’s literally never told anything.

"So, Mary, which Happy Meal would you like?" Dan asked again. 

Mary mumbled something, scuffing her foot against the floor. Dan sighed and leaned down. 

"What was that? That was too mumbly-bumbly for me to understand you." 

She said it again, a bit clearer this time, and Dan stood up and relayed the information to Phil: hamburger Happy Meal, fries, and a juice box. 

"Alright, will that be all?" Phil asked. _Please, dear god, let that be all._

"I WANT A SHAKE!" yelled Marcus. 

Dan rolled his eyes. "Yes, thank you. That'll be all." 

"Okay, is that for here or to go?"

"Sorry to bug you more, but it'll be for here," Dan cringed a little as he said it. 

Phil smiled a bit more genuinely at that; it was sweet of him to acknowledge that his party was a bit unruly. "That's alright, it'll actually be a bit easier as we won't have to pack it all and figure out how you'll carry all your food out. Can I have a name for the order?"

"Dan," he replied. Phil had expected that, of course, but he had to ask or he'd get in trouble. It was nice to have the name confirmed, anyway. 

Dan paid for the food and Phil told him it would be out momentarily. The staff in the kitchen had actually already compiled most of the meals and Phil just had to gather it all and throw it (gently, of course, we can't upset the customers) into the Happy Meal boxes with toys and put it onto the tray. 

Once the order was mostly taken care of and his coworkers said they would handle the rest, Phil moved on through the line that had formed, luckily with much less issues, until almost the very last person in line walked up. 

"Can't you get those kids to shut the hell up?" she said, none too quietly. 

"I-I'm sorry, there's not much I can do. If you talk to the family yourself, I'm sure they'll be willing to quiet down a bit," Phil replied as diplomatically as possible. 

"This is YOUR restaurant, it's YOUR job to fix it. Get them to stop."

"Okay, ma'am, I will try. May I take your order first, though, so your food will be prepared as I talk to them?"

"No, deal with the problem now!" she yelled. 

"Ma'am, there are other people in line right now. I can't go talk to them until I've made sure the next customers will also be served in a-"

"I don't give a damn! Fix the fucking problem now or I'll take my business elsewhere! Where's your manager?!" the woman screamed. 

Everyone in the restaurant stared. One of the kids with Dan started bawling her eyes out as Dan tried frantically to tell the others that they _really aren't allowed to say those words, they're very rude and your mother would kill me if she thought you picked them up from me, don't say them ever._

Phil was shocked and couldn't move. He had never had someone swear or scream at him at work before and it was extremely disconcerting. 

"Well?! I asked you a question! I want to see your manager right fucking now!" she bellowed. 

Phil's mouth moved but no words would come out. Luckily, the kitchen was small enough that some of his coworkers ran to grab their manager, who walked out to the front quickly. 

"What seems to be the problem here, ma'am?" Phil's manager, James, asked with his standard Manager Smile (how he made it look genuine, Phil would never know). 

"The problem is that this employee is refusing to do what I ask him to do and those damn kids won't shut the hell up!" she hollered again. 

James knew Phil and knew he wouldn’t refuse to do anything that was reasonable of him to do or within his job description. He took one glance over at Phil and saw him white-as-a-sheet pale and clearly very uncomfortable. "Ma'am, is there something we can get for you?"

"Yes, get those damn kids to shut up! Tell that wimp of a father to grow a pair and man up, show them what's what and take control of his damn family like a man!" 

Phil glanced over at Dan to see him shrinking further into the seat as he tried to calm down the bawling girl and get the rest of the kids to quiet down. 

"Ma'am, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. You're upsetting the other customers and holding up my line. Please leave." 

After a bit more yelling and a few empty threats, the woman finally left. 

James turned to Phil, asking, "Are you okay? You should go on break now. I'll deal with your register and customers. Go get yourself some fries or something and sit somewhere for a bit, I'll take care of it."

Phil nodded numbly, making his way to the back to grab his phone, a large fry, and a drink, before going out to the dining room, where the kids were still very loud and the customers that had been in line stared at him or sent him pitying glances. Phil kept to himself as best he could. 

After a few minutes, some of the shock wore off, the adrenaline leaving his body. He was exhausted, but he still had five hours of work left and he had such a pounding headache, amplified by the screaming- wait. The kids weren't yelling anymore. 

Phil looked up quickly, hoping that he would still see Dan since he was pretty and intriguing and good with kids. What he found, however, surprised him so much he nearly fell backwards out of his chair. 

Right in front of him was the whole family again, from Dan to Janet, Marcus, Mary, and June, all of them very quiet. 

"Um, hi?" Phil squeaked. 

Dan smiled a bit at that, then said, "Okay, guys, what do we say?"

"Thank youuuuu," the kids intoned. 

"And?" 

"We're sorry for being so loud," they added. 

"And?" 

"Have a nice day!" they finished proudly. 

Phil was incredibly touched. He really did like kids, after all, he just was having a rough day. "Oh, thanks guys! I hope you have a nice day, too!" Phil grinned at them; they were pretty cute, now that they weren't all yelling.

"Okay, now go get your jackets," Dan told them. They immediately got louder again, but Phil couldn't bring himself to care. He was too busy wondering why this unbelievably attractive man was still talking to him. 

"Um, thanks for that, it was really cute," Phil said. 

Dan smiled ( _Oh my god he has a dimple,_ thought Phil) and nodded. "It was the least I could do. I really am sorry they were so obnoxious earlier, and I'm very sorry that we got you in trouble with that lady. That was really horrible. If there's anything else I can do to make it up to you, please let me know."

"Oh, no, it's okay. You don't have to do anything for me. I got to go on break while customers were still in line, it’s great. What about you? Are you okay after all those horrible things she said?"

Dan blushed and hung his head a bit. "Oh, yeah. I'm okay. I mean, I'm not their dad, I'm just their uncle, so the fatherhood comments didn't really bug me, and, I mean, I don't need to be secure in my masculinity like others. I'm just glad she didn't find out I'm gay, cuz that would've made it way worse." Dan looked up at Phil a bit through his fringe on that comment, clearly not-so-subtly trying to gauge the odds of Phil being interested in him. 

"Oh, yeah, that would've been horrible. I would have had to take the whole rest of the day off for that, I really can't stand homophobic slurs. It just gets too personal." 

Dan nodded with a slightly bigger smile than before. "I- well, I'm sorry if I've read the situation wrong, but- well, could I get your number? It's just, I mean, you're really cute and very nice and I thought I'd regret it if I didn't ask. I mean- don't feel like you have to, just please don't give me some fake number. Just tell me flat-out if you don't want to give it to me, it makes everything easier later. Oh, this was a bad idea, I'm sorry, I'm so awkwa-"

Phil's giggles cut him off. "No, no, you were right. Gimme your phone so I can put in my number."

Dan looked relieved, blushed, and handed over his phone. Phil put his number in and saved his contact name with the fries emoji, then sent himself a text from Dan's phone. 

"I'm glad you asked me for my number, I don't think I would've had the guts to ask for yours," Phil joked shyly, making Dan blush even harder. 

Before Dan could reply, a small voice interrupted them. 

"Uncle Dan, we're ready to go now! Stop talking already!" 

Dan rolled his eyes. "They get really antsy when adults start talking. Their mother insists on chatting forever with her friends, so they always try to annoy her into leaving but, apparently, they do that with everyone. I better go now before it gets worse.”

Phil giggled a bit, then said, "Yeah, you probably should. I'll see you around." 

Dan gave another shy smile. "Yeah, I'll text you." He waved, then turned and corralled the kids out the door. 

When Phil got off work a few hours later, he would find a text from Dan. 

 _I know you said I don't have to, but could I make it up to you with a date?_  

And, of course, Phil would agree.


End file.
